On December 3, families from CMPI and other Pathways programs had the remarkable experience of attending a workshop with Ralph Goosby and Jiji Kim-Goosby, parents of acclaimed violinist Randall Goosby.
Multiple pearls of wisdom emerged during this meeting, and we wanted to make sure all families heard some of the Goosbys’ most critical points. Here are some of their top tips for raising a young musician.
It is important to have others surrounding you to support musical development – it really does take a village.
The Goosbys shared how Randall’s school made it possible for him to succeed by providing extra early morning tutoring and excusing his frequent absences. Music teachers, friends, and many others helped to support Randall and his family during his middle and high school years, making it possible for him to achieve all he did. The Goosbys also were extraordinarily dedicated to their children, routinely driving up to eight hours round trip for lessons, or flying to New York for precollege classes.
Kids have different personalities, and it is important to treat different kids differently.
Because the Goosbys have multiple children in music, they found out that different strategies work for different children. You need to approach siblings uniquely, finding the right structure and method for each individual child. For example, violinist Randall thrived with teachers who were strict and firm. On the other hand, their cellist son Miles needed a more nurturing and positive approach from his teacher. Randall was a very committed student from a very young age, whereas Miles had a bumpier path to his music career.
The chemistry between student and teacher is everything.
Both parents emphasized how the fit between student and teacher is critical. If the chemistry or commitment is not there, it may be time to find another teacher. Both of their children went through multiple teachers that were not necessarily the right fit at the right time, and they learned it was better to find that teacher-student chemistry then to stick with something that does not work.
Balance is very important – you must balance practicing, performing, and other aspects of life.
Ms. Goosby emphasized how she was very strict about practicing, requiring her children to practice until an egg timer in the kitchen went off. But as soon as that egg timer was done, kids were allowed to be kids and play sports or play outside. All of their children found a balance between music and non-music activities, combining some elements of strictness and other elements of freedom.
Expose young musicians to other kids like them.
The Goosbys continually emphasized how transformative summer programs, especially the Perlman Music Program and NYO, were for their children. These programs introduced their children to others just like them, who understood what it was like to be a young musician, practice, and perform.
Being humble is the most important thing, and sharing your music with audiences and students is a privilege for any musician.
Both parents emphasized that being humble, avoiding comparisons and terms like “prodigy,” was critical in parenting their children. Making music is not about accolades, fame, or who is the best. It is about giving a part of yourself to your audience, and sharing the music inside of you.
Images
Stock photo, Randall Goosby headshot from his website